Alpha Bête-Noire

Articulate. You like me when I wear my words

Besides that’s why you bought me dinner in the first place, or was it coffee?

Caffeine sounds more like us. We’re not big on food most of the time.

Don’t you remember? Don’t you recall I said

Entry is your strong suit—

Fucking is a good way for you to practice entry and you practice it on me all the time.

Granted I let you in that time you knocked after I first kissed you goodbye in your rattling old Camry and I said

Have you forgotten something or did you just want me to watch you leave

Instead of closing the door behind me while you sit in the driver’s seat with a damp filter between your fingers and the ashes falling on your tightening lap?

Just kidding come on in and you did and you showed me how to have a good time just like they write on the backs of toilet doors, with a phone number that may or may not be yours—

Know this, you said.

Listen carefully, you said.

Mostly I don’t fall in love, that’s not my kind of thing and I listened carefully just like you told me to and I didn’t say anything just popped you in my mouth because it was an ad break

No wait

Off the top of my head that might have been a different time.

People don’t belong in pairs you said one other time it seems unnatural to me. We’re independent beings. We don’t need each other for anything anymore not even procreation you can get that from a test tube if you really want it and I laughed it off like whatever man

Quit your ranting you’re starting to sound like John Titor just pass the joint already.

Realistically, you know, we probably would be good together in the long run. We’re both cynical and practical and we both like to read copies of Orwell that smell like the second-hand bookshops we bought them from and we’ve both got noses that would look acceptable on our hypothetical children and that’s a good thing because I’d never date anyone with a nose I’d feel guilty about having bestowed upon my offspring

Still

The ways in which we frame our future—

Unavoidable, unintentional—

Very much frighten us and we hold each other on the bed with sheets tangled around our ankles like manacles and say to one another repeatedly

We’ll never be like that we’ll never be like that we’ll never be like that

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