dumplings are fake

i’m so authentic i use chopsticks to eat macaroni
watch hentai on my huawei
and go to ponsonby central to eat chinese

i don’t carry hot sauce in my bag, but i do bring soy to the party
my favourite movie of all time is studio ghibli
and my dad is the white side of the family

my phone vibrates every time a council says “diversity targets”
i get suggested ads for the national party in chinese,
and that thinkpiece on bubble tea is a redirect to my
dot com slash about me

i’m so authentic all my exes had asian fetishes
my mum she love the white man at her dinner table
he tells me to say something in my language
so i say “hello”

and he says
wow! say something else!

so authentic i hugged my granddad on my trip home
and he froze at the shock of intimacy
(we’re that great at building walls)

my great grandma would walk up and down a mountain
with bound feet and huge sacks of rice on her back
for her husband, and i can’t even text a guy back

guilt is an after school curricular
filial piety an apology

i learnt off my mum to fear a full stomach
and i’m always too heavy

my best representation is in a section of pornhub
where all the asian girls and the mixed chicks don’t speak
have big tits, and white men cum all over their faces

i posted about it on snapchat the other day
then a dude screenshotted my next selfie

so authentic i was already just a space that needed filling
something to discipline

tall poppy in a sea of lotus,
                                                                           blooming

 

 

 

 

Vanessa Crofskey is an artist whose practice spans the boundaries of installation, poetry and performance. She is Chinese-European, and based in Auckland.

Vanessa currently runs Fake American Accent, occasionally does features for money, and has appeared in Cahoodadoodling, Depot Artspace, Dear Journal and The Machinery. Find her taking ridiculous bathroom selfies @officialtrashqueen.

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