I started teaching my new Intermediate English class. We played a game to practise the future tense. We went around in a circle and the students had to tell me one thing they would do to help me throw a party. One girl said she would bring alcohol. Another boy said he would bring music. Another guy said he would bring me to his house afterwards. I stopped the game and one guy said ‘Puta’ to his friend.
I talked to the new Night Supervisor about the class. She said I should talk to the students. I talked to the receptionist. He said I could tell the students that they were breaching the rules of their visa and they could be deported. I talked to my mother and she said I should start wearing a bra.
I swiped a lot on Tinder. I went out with a boy named Nils. He suggested we go to The Continental and he had a cocktail served in a soup can and I had a glass of wine because the soup-can cocktails were expensive. I didn’t realise he would offer to pay. Then we went and drank at The Courthouse. I asked him to be rough and he was. He left his shirt behind – the one he had been wearing in his Tinder photo. I told him but he never asked for it back. I looked it up online and it was worth about $180. I’ve listed it on ebay for $10 five times but it’s never sold.
My friend Josh came up to Sydney from Melbourne for my 26th birthday. We went to dinner and then danced at Stonewall. Josh found a boy to go home with and I found a cab. Josh felt bad about finding a boy and leaving me to go home in the cab on my birthday. I didn’t feel bad at all. I was tired.
I went out with a boy named Michael. We drank a lot at Frankie’s Pizza and then we drank a lot at the Courthouse. He was thirty-two on his Tinder profile, but then he said he was thirty-five. I asked him to wear a condom but he didn’t. He said I had known he wasn’t wearing one. This was bullshit, he said, it wasn’t only his fault.
I went out with a boy named Oliver. We went to The Courthouse and he threw my beer in the garden as a joke and then a condom in my face as a joke. I laughed both times because I was uncomfortable. When I got really stressed that he had walked into my housemate’s room instead of the bathroom he said I was making him uncomfortable and that I needed to stop. I asked him if we would see each other again in the morning. He asked, ‘Will we?’.
I went to Newtown Medical Clinic to get a sexual health test. They told me they would ring me if there was a problem. I asked them to ring me even if there wasn’t a problem because I would worry. They said they wouldn’t and I asked why and they said that wasn’t not what they did and I asked if they could, etc.
I worried about having to get an abortion. I hated scheduling things and I was scared about how much it would cost. I asked Josh in a jokey way if it was bad I was only worried about that. They said that abortions sounded like awful and really uncomfortable procedures. I hadn’t even thought to worry about that but I was still more worried about the money. And the scheduling.
I went out with another boy named Michael. We talked for about half an hour at the Midnight Special in Newtown. He said we should do this again soon even though there was no reason we should. I said I was tired and it was nice to have met him even though it wasn’t. I was tired though. I deleted Tinder.
Instead of Maloney’s, one Friday we went to The Courthouse for English class. The student who had offered to take me home in the first class said, ‘I did not like you at the start at all but now I like you’. I still did not like him. I followed the only student who I thought maybe did not like me when he went to have a cigarette outside and then I kissed him. I took him home. His name was Vinicius.
Jessie Perrin is a writer currently based in Sydney. Her work has been heard on FBi Radio and has appeared in publications including Scum Magazine, Ibis House, Lor Journal and Voiceworks.