small victories

 

for Daisy

I kissed your face, and
it tasted good
until it didn’t. Or,
I wasn’t tasting it any more,
so it tasted of nothing.

The space between our
histories, our
soft pelts and able eyes
is widening
but I am close to the ground
and not running, so
there is something to be said
for this stillness.

In the rip of time
I have sewn the torn shoulder
back to my green shirt,
re-stitched a round white button
to the pink dress,
and let my shadow slink
back from the sill
to keep me warm again.

I have lathered and rinsed my hair,
cut my fringe,
held a grubby hand up
sweating, sun drenched
new growth.

Hung out clothes to dry,
made coffee,
walked the park,
held the moon to my cheek
and got out of bed
and got out of bed
and got out of bed, and showered
and dressed and fed
this bag of bones
and sustained a life

without you.

Some days the victory
is a waving crowd of people,
is climbing the mountain
at sunrise,
is printed and bound
is framed and hung
and shining and large.

Some days,
the victory is still being here,
still mine.

 

 

 

 

 

Izzy Roberts-Orr is a Narrm/Melbourne writer, producer and broadcaster, Artistic Director and Co-CEO of the Emerging Writers’ Festival and a Co-Director of Broadwave podcasting network. Her practice spans sound, stage, page and public space and explores feminisms, futures and empathy.

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